Wrebecca’s Writing Wrules

I found it was hard to come up with a comprehensive list of rules for writers.  Mainly because this whole blog is that, and I don’t just want to sit here repeating myself.  But also because something like writing is hard to sum up.  Everyone has a different process, their own muse, their own favorite time to write, etc.  That being said, I did take a crack at it.  You will see some repetition; that was unavoidable.  That’s why certain things on the list will have links in them – they’ll just lead to the posts where I talked in more detail about that particular item.  Soooo…here goes with the list.

1. You never know nearly as much as you think you do – This is not as depressing as it sounds.  If you have read the beginning of my blog, and I’m talking about the first ten posts or so, you will notice that I was an idiot back then.  Did you see the kinds of advice I gave?  Did you see the apologies I had to issue for that advice?  Writing means, among other things, constantly learning.  You will never be done learning.  It is ongoing.  And that is good.  Constant improvement.  It’s not something you have to strive for; it just happens.  The more you write, the more you learn.

2. Go with your gut – I cannot count how many times I have brought this up in this blog.  But I figure there’s a reason for it.  I really do believe that your gut instinct as a writer is your greatest resource.

Listen to Your Gut

If your are reading a sentence, and that sentence simply doesn’t feel right, then there is a good chance you need to reword it.  If a character does not feel believable to you, then maybe you need to think about why that is.

3. Read – This should be obvious, but I want to restate it here.  You cannot be a good writer if you do not first have a basic grasp of what good writing is.  Now I am not saying that all published books are good.  *cough* Twilight *cough*  But the point is that you should be able to weed out which books are and aren’t good if you read enough.  And it’s not enough to say “I don’t like this book” and then throw it into the trash.  You have to be able to identify why you don’t like it.  It’s the same if you like a book.  Why?  What are the best aspects of your favorite author’s writing?  Being able to identify you reasons for liking or disliking some piece of writing will help you grow as a writer.

4. Nothing is anything until it is something – I started saying this to my friends and family the moment the possibility of me getting an agent arose.  It’s true in the book business, but probably in most of the entertainment industry and just the business world in general.  It’s my own variation on “Don’t count your chickens until they hatch” I guess.  But it applies to more than just signing with an agent and chewing your nails down to stubs while you wait anxiously to see if your book will actually get published or if the Rejection Amoeba will shoot you down.  It’s about writing at its core.  You have to actually write something for it to be something.  An idea is just an idea.  Words on a page are a thing.  You can change, edit, delete, whatever, but none of that is possible without taking the first step.  Embark on the journey.  There’s no risk, except maybe carpal tunnel.

Carpal Tunnel

5. Read it out loud – You should be prepared to read your whole book out loud, though special attention should be given to the dialogue.  You will be able to tell if your writing sounds genuine pretty easily if you feel comfortable saying the words you wrote out loud.  If you don’t, maybe you need to rework it a bit.  This works really well with dialogue because that is the part we are most used to delivering through speech, so if something you wrote as speech doesn’t sound normal to your ears, then you know it’s probably not believable in writing.

Read Aloud

6. Show Don’t Tell – This is a classic.  And I know I’ve talked about it at least twice before, but I only remember one post where I talked about it extensively, so that’s the one I’m going to link to.  Other than that, I have nothing to say besides please please please follow this rule.  I know Telling can be a style choice, but it’s very hard to do that well if you’re not already a skilled writer.

7. Challenge Yourself – One of my favorite posts on this blog is the one titled “They Say.”  I had a lot of fun writing it, and it expressed one of my biggest beliefs about writing – that you don’t have to limit yourself.  If you feel most comfortable writing short stories, maybe the challenge is to write a novel.  If you write mainly Fiction, maybe the challenge is to try some Nonfiction.  It might be terrible.  At least on your first attempt (I know my first attempts at Realistic Fiction were all just…awful.)  But it’s a learning experience, and one that I think is really crucial to the growth of a writer.  If you are constantly pushing your limits, you not only learn new things about yourself, but you learn new things about writing, and what it means to you.  So find a challenge, give yourself an assignment, Google “writing exercises,” ask a friend for a list of words that must be included in a story (see below the Word of the Day), and just get to it.

I think that’s it.  I don’t know if that advice was so much about writing.  It may have been more about being a writer.  But I think that kind of advice is just as valid.  So here’s a comic (click to enlarge) and Word of the Day.  Don’t forget to keep scrolling down for my Writing Challenge!

Writer's Block Strip 9

Word of the Day: Crucial (adj) – involving an extremely important decision or result; decisive; critical.

Bex’s Writing Challenge!

In order to do my part to encourage you to challenge yourself, I have decided to offer a small writing assignment for all interested parties.  As I said above, a great writing challenge is to take a random list of words and incorporate them into a story.  Ever heard of Flash Fiction?  It’s a really, really short piece of fiction that usually ranges from about 200 to 500 words.  My challenge to you is to take the list of words below and use them in a piece of Flash Fiction.  Then, if you so desire, post that story in the comments section.  I will read and offer my comments to all those who choose to take part.  (Don’t worry.  I’ll be nice.  And this is an optional thing, obviously.  I’m not going to find where you live and threaten you until you write short fiction for my amusement).

So here’s your list:

Apple

Expensive

Ordinary

Superfluous

Tangible

Officer

Weirdly

[End List]

I will probably take up the challenge myself and post my story for all to see.  Until then, Happy Writing!

3 Comments

Filed under books, Comic, Humor, writing

Bravely Boring

I thought I’d ring in the new year with a divergence from my usual talk about books.  I’m going to do a movie review, even though this movie has been out for forever and this review is way late.  But the Oscars are coming up, so maybe it’ll be pertinent in a couple months.  First…

[SPOILER ALERT]

We’re going to talk about Brave.  If for any reason you do not want any part of Brave spoiled for you, you’d best stop reading now.  It’s okay, I’ll forgive you.

So the reason I wanted to talk about Brave is that everybody went all crazy about this one issue: It was Pixar’s first female protagonist.  Pixar’s first female protagonist had the most cliche plot that can be given to a female protagonist – Action Princess No Want Marry.

Here’s the issue I took with it: It didn’t even do that.  Seriously.  I went into this movie going “It may be cliche but by the power of Grayskull I don’t care.  It’ll be pretty.  I mean, just look at the trailers!  So much pretty scenery!  And a horse!  I love horsies!”  That may not be a direct quote.  I don’t remember the exact words I thought as I seated myself in the theater, but that pretty much sums it up.

So here’s the problem: You know all of the pretty scenery and adventurey stuff they showed the little Scottish princess seeing and doing, respectively, in the trailer?  You know…The horseback riding along a seaside cliff and climbing to the top of a rock and dancing on it with a huge waterfall in the background?  Go watch the trailer on YouTube if you don’t know what I’m talking about.  I’ll wait.  Ok…seen it?  Right.  All that stuff?  First five minutes of the movie.

The rest of the movie?  Bears.  Not kidding.  See the whole big deal is that Merida, the princess, has a bad relationship with her mother.  So one day, while riding through one of the three or four sets that are recycled again and again all throughout the movie, she finds a witch’s cottage.  She asks the witch for a way to change her mother, and the witch gives her a spell that turns her mother into a bear.  A freaking bear, people.  The rest of the movie is bear shenanigans.  They sneak out of the castle because Merida’s father is all about killing bears, and Merida is afraid he will kill his wife in bear-form, and then they go to a cave and Merida’s mother tries to use sticks to properly cut up her food and eat like a lady and Merida teaches  her how to be a proper bear.  Not joking.  She teaches her how to go into a river and catch fish in her mouth.  Through this, her mother realizes that her daughter learned a great deal of useful things all those times she roughed it in the woods or whatever.  Then they have a big showdown with the villain – a different bear.  God I wish I were making this up.  He was a prince once, and he met the same witch Merida did, who apparently only knows how to make things that aren’t bears into bears.  The end battle?  A big bear showdown.   Wanna know how useful Merida’s archery skills were in this showdown?  I’ll give you a guess.  That’s right not at all useful.  Remember what I said about Chekhov’s gun?  Merida’s bow and arrows were the gun.  They were useless.  She shot some arrows sure, and they hit the bear bad guy, but they had less than any effect.  They might as well have been fighting a honey badger for all that the villain didn’t care about her puny arrows.

So everyone was all up in arms about an action princess being Pixar’s first female main character, and it wasn’t even that.  She didn’t have some great big adventure.  She barely strayed five miles (kilometers?) from her castle.  And there was a lot of making fun of Scottish people.  A lot.

Stereotypical Scot

The one thing I liked about that movie was their version of a Will-o’-the-Wisp.  The Wisps were these creepy little blue ghost things that Merida saw at plot-convenient times, and her mother encouraged her to follow them because they’d “lead her to her destiny.”  Only thing is they looked more like they were leading her to her death…wait…isn’t that actually what they do?  Yeah, turns out Will-o’-the-Wisps are little lights that lead travelers off the safe paths they’re on.  Nothing to do with destiny there.  Unless it’s your destiny to die after being stupid enough to follow some creepy little ghost lights off of the trail you’re on and into the great unknown.

So Brave was a disappointment.  It really was.  It was like Pixar couldn’t even be bothered to try coming up with a viable plot for a girl.  This is what I imagine the brainstorming meeting went like:

“She’s going to have an arranged marriage to some kilt-wearing imbecile, but she doesn’t want to get married.  So she beats all her imbecilic suitors in an archery contest and that’s the first fifteen minutes of the movie.  Then what?”

“Uhhhh….bears?”

“Great job, Frank.  We should smoke weed in our meetings more often.  Let’s go get some pizza.  We’ll leave the interns to write the rest of the script.”

TL;DR?

Brave = Tremendous Disappointment.  Full of Bears.

Have a comic (click to enlarge):

Writer's Block Strip 8

Word of the Day: Will-o’-the-Wisp (n) – anything that deludes or misleads by luring on.

3 Comments

Filed under Comic, Humor

Catching Up

Haven’t written in a while.  I bet you’re all waiting on the edge of your seats to find out what’s new and different in my life.  Good news, everyone!  I won’t keep you waiting any longer.

First, as of December 24, 2012, I am 22 years old.  Wooooo….

Second, as of December 18, 2012, I am done with my internship.  However, I am not done with my boss, because also as of December 18, 2012, she has agreed to represent me.  So I have an agent who is going to help me sell Hellbound.  WOOOOO!

For the record, my book finally getting representation does have a lot to do with the fact that I worked for this woman.  BUT, my boss would not have represented me if she thought my book was sub par.  I would know – She has read and rejected her own interns’ work while I was working for her.  I don’t want to toot my own horn…

Blowing own Horn

…but Hellbound is written pretty well, so I’m glad that she recognized this.

So I have an agent who likes my work.  Does this mean that Hellbound is now officially going to get published absolutely yes no doubt about it?  Unfortunately, no.  Part of this blog is about you guys following me on my path to getting published, so I decided to share with you more about the process.  What I have just embarked on is an even longer journey than the actual “writing the book” part, and the road is still paved with rejection.

Let’s say you’re a writer.  For the purposes of this exercise, you are a clown.

Clown Again

Actually, let’s say you’re a clown who has written a book.

Clown with Book

Now, you want to get your book published.  There are a lot of people out there that your book has to impress before that can happen.  There’s your agent…

Clown with Agent

If the agent likes it, he or she will pitch your book to an editor…

Clown with Agent and editor

If the editor likes it, he or she will pitch your book to the editorial staff + whoever the editorial staff reports to.  They are represented here by an amorphous blob of rejection, sometimes known as the Rejection Amoeba.

Clown with Agent and editor and amoeba

If any of these people or Amoebas say no to your book, back to you it goes.  All the way down the line.  And you’re back to being a sad clown with a book, standing on square one and wondering if maybe you should have stuck to making balloon animals at birthday parties.

Depressing as that sounds, I am really happy to have an agent.  It means I am on my way.  I will give you the details of the process as it continues, because I know this is just as important to you as it is to me.  And who knows?  Maybe one day I’ll give away signed copies to all my blog followers.  And by “give away” I mean “Sell at maybe a discounted price.”  Hey, authors need to eat, too.

Comic!  I gave up on trying to write comprehensibly.  You’re welcome! (Click to enlarge)

Writer's Block Strip 7

Word of the Day: Sycophant (n) – a self-seeking, servile flatterer; fawning parasite.

P.S. I haven’t forgotten about the fact that I mentioned writing my own comprehensive list of advice for writers.  I’ll get around to it eventually.  It’s harder than it seems.

2 Comments

Filed under books, Comic, Humor, writing